Night Weaning: A Gentle Approach for You and Your Child

Understanding Night Weaning

Are you feeling exhausted and burnt out by breastfeeding but not quite ready to wean? Nightweaning may be for you! 

Night weaning is the process of reducing and eventually stopping nighttime feedings for your baby. This step can be challenging for both parents and babies. It's important to approach it gently and with a combination of patience and determination. It can be a nice alternative to fully weaning. 

Many parents wonder when the right time is to start night weaning. Nightweaning is not recommended prior to 12 months of age. Often people recommend 18 months of age because the child is more able to understand the concept, but it is definitely possible to nightwean before this. 

Arguably nightweaning readiness has much more to do with where you are at than wehther or not your child is ready. Most children, if they were to choose, would not nightwean. The reality is, breastfeeding throughout the night is a lot on the body, mind and spirit! It is okay if you have hit your limit. 

Creating a Night Weaning Plan

Creating a plan can make night weaning smoother for everyone. There are 2 approaches. You can do it all at once or cut back gradually. It really just depends on what sounds more manageable to you. The book Nursies When The Sun Shines can be a helpful tool in explaining the concept to your child. 

It really all comes down to will and determination. Make up your mind that you are ready! Pick a time where you have some extra time to rest during the day because it may intially result in some sleepless nights. Your child will likely not be thrilled about this process. 

Believe in yourself! You can do this! You may be really used to comforting your child with the boob but there are other options available. They often take more work at first but they will eventually be comforting to your child.

- have a bottle of water ready at the bedside

- if your child is teething consider giving a dose of ibuprofen before bed (ideally you wouldn't nightwean while teething but kids are always teething)

- enlist the support of a partner or friend (it can be very helpful to handoff at 4 am when you're at your wit's end)

- back rubs, walking back and forth, singing, rocking in a rocking chair are all helpful methods

- offering a favorite stuffed animal or blanket for comfort

- don't be afraid of just offering a snack (our 4 am wakeups were unbearable until my husband figured out if you offer our kid a nutrigrain bar he will eat it and immediately fall back asleep, saved an hour of misery each night and he's already starting to grow out of this)

- remember everything is temporary! It really depends on the kid how long they will protest over nightweaning. I nightweaned my daughter at 18 months and it was a few miserable nights but she caught on pretty quickly and starting sleeping much better. I nightweaned my son at 14 months and it was a much more challenging time and he took a couple weeks to accept there would be no more "bop" at night. 

- if this is what you need, it will all be worth it in the end!

Stick to your plan and try to maintain a regular nighttime routine. This helps your baby understand that nighttime is for sleeping, not feeding.

It might take a few weeks for your baby to adjust to the new routine. Be patient and stay consistent with your approach.

Handling Setbacks

Setbacks are normal during the night weaning process. Your baby might wake up more often or seem fussier than usual. This is a normal part of the adjustment period.

Stay calm and continue to offer comfort without feeding. Over time, your baby will adapt to the new routine. It's also okay if you have a really bad night and need to feed. It's a process. Please be kind to yourself. It's also okay to change your mind and decide the time is not right. You can always try again in the future. Often people try and nightwean before 18 months and find it so challenging they stop and try again at 18 month and have success. 

Additionally, night weaning can encourage a more structured daytime feeding schedule, ensuring your baby gets the necessary nutrients during the day.

When to Seek Help

If you find the night weaning process particularly challenging, don't hesitate to seek help. Your pediatrician can offer advice and support. You can also consider consulting a sleep specialist or a lactation consultant for additional guidance.

Remember, every baby is different, and what works for one family might not work for another. Trust your instincts and do what feels right for you and your baby.

Conclusion

Night weaning is a significant milestone in your baby's development. Approach it with patience, determination and consistency. It is not helpful to anyone to plow through your need to sleep and have your body to yourself at night. It can make a big difference in how you feel in your body to have boundaries around breastfeeding. Find the right time for you and trust that you can do this! It will be hard but, most often, worth it!